I hate to fly. Actually that’s a lie. I feel very ambiguous about flying. It’s dumb because it’s not your natural environment, because humans can’t fly and their bodies get weird when they do and sometimes they fart, but also, flying is amazing because it’s an unnatural environment and you see cool clouds and you get somewhere else and no one notices if you fart.
Flying is difficult also because you have to sit on the same chair all the time, and first it’s okay, but then your body hurts a lot. Like your back and your neck. It’s difficult to sleep on a plane too, so you are also tired. The food is sometimes okay, sometimes it’s really bad, so that’s bad too. Sometimes you need to sit next to someone you don’t want to sit next to. Basically a lot of annoying stuff can happen.
I flew to Austria a while ago. You need to travel for a long time to get there. I had to travel 18 hours. I flew to London first. I flew to London because I decided to fly with Virgin Atlantic instead of Lufthansa. Virgin America is my favorite airline ever, and I thought if I fly Virgin Atlantic it would be like flying with Virgin America but much longer and better.
Virgin Atlantic is very different from Virgin America. It’s like a completely different airline! They did everything differently, and I am going to write a review about it later.
I did a trick when I dropped off my luggage. It wasn’t really a trick but maybe now it is. I had checked in online an hour or two before and chosen a window seat. I like the window seat because it has a window to look out of and it’s good to lean against if you want to sleep. When you are a kid, you always fight with your sibling to have to window seat, so when you grow up it seems natural to take it. But on long flights, aisle seats are good too. They allow you to stand up without waking up the people next to you.
When you fly, drinking a lot of water is the most important thing in the world. It’s because of science stuff, like something about you sitting a long time and the air pressure and your blood and stuff. If you don’t drink enough water and move you could die!!! But most people don’t know that. They fly and they try extra hard to not drink water because peeing on the airplane is dumb (because you need to wake up the people next to you to stand up). But I drink a lot of water (you need to buy it before you go on, because on the plane you only get small glasses, but my trick is usually that I ask them to fill my water bottle with their water bottle, because have you ever bought water at the airport? It’s very expensive), so I need to pee a lot and get up a lot. So basically I decided I want to change from my window seat to an aisle seat. I went to drop off my luggage and told the man that I want to change to an aisle seat. He changed me, and then I got the best seat ever - in the aisle in the middle of the first row! So no one was in front of me and I had more leg room, but the kind where I can prop up my legs against a wall. Cool!
I did something that is maybe illegal. I took an orange in my bag and took it with me until Austria. I went into security, but no one noticed it. So I took it on my flight. But my suspicion is that they secretly saw it and they made a note about it on my file. Then when I come back through immigration they would use it against me and never let me back inside the States because they would have said I’m a smuggler of fruit and maybe drugs (they would have invented the drugs part, but prove them wrong! You can’t!!). But it didn’t happen, so that is cool.
The end.
